It seems as though April has unintentionally become something of a month of Marvel, but 2004's The Punisher is one I've been meaning to check out for a while. Thomas Jane stars as Frank Castle, an ex-soldier who takes on the mantle of the titular vigilante after his family is murdered by a Tampa crime boss (John Travolta). After cheating death and returning to Florida, Frank modifies a Dodge Charger, amasses an absurd amount of munitions, and begins to hunt down those responsible for his family's death in some of the most entertainingly elaborate ways possible.
To be blunt, I was completely surprised that this was a movie from 2004. The entire thing is written and shot like a Commando-esque action flick from the late 80's or early 90's. It wasn't until I spotted "2003" on a gravestone that it dawned on me that this was a movie made in this century. All that said, an over-the-top action flick is exactly what a film adaptation of The Punisher should be. In the starring role we've got Thomas Jane, who is literally the perfect man to portray Frank on screen; his voice, his appearance, and the way he changes from a happy, contented family man to a dark and vengeful shell of a person are all spot-on. For the most part, the cast of this film is more or less unimpressive, but Jane definitely stands out as the highlight for all the right reasons.
Standing out for all the wrong reasons, we have John Travolta as Howard Saint. He's a Miami crime boss who chews scenery with all the enthusiasm of a spastic beaver. To give you a litmus test of the kind of villain John Travolta plays in this movie, imagine that he's just murdered someone by hurling them off of a bridge onto some train tracks. Soon after, they are killed by the speeding locomotive, only for him to later quip that this person "took the train". Know that this is not a hypothetical scenario; this is an actual scene read by the actual John Tavolta. He's by no means a good villain, but I can't bring myself to say that I didn't enjoy his performance. It's just so hilariously over-the-top that it's impossible not to have fun while he's on screen. When he's in the morgue, identifying his dead son's body, take a shot every time he talks to the corpse, caresses his son's face, or kisses him gently on the forehead. That's honestly the most intriguing thing about this movie; Thomas Jane is so perfect as Frank Castle while the rest of the cast is so ridiculous, it's almost as if a totally serious character wandered onto the set of a spoof.
As I mentioned, the supporting cast is pretty forgettable. There's Frank's neighbors, Joan (a kind waitress played by Rebecca Romijn), Dave (a heavily-pierced geek portrayed by Ben Foster), and Bumpo. Just based on his name, I'd like anyone who isn't familiar with The Punisher comics to identify what Bumpo's singular trait is. If you guessed that he's a big fat guy played by John Pinette who enjoys food, congratulations, you're right. All of these characters appeared in the comics, so kudos to the filmmakers for sticking to the source material, but they don't really add anything to the movie. Dave has a pretty good scene in which he is interrogated by Travolta's lackeys, but that's about it. The only good thing I can say about Bumpo is that he likes to play opera records while cooking. The sound of opera serves as the background music for what I think is one of the best fight scenes I've ever seen in a comic book film.
For anyone who's already familiar with the movie, you of course know I'm referring to the iconic fight scene between Frank Castle and The Russian (played by the incomparable Kevin Nash, of Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles 2: The Secret of the Ooze fame). It's a classic gag; something wild is happening, but no one notices it because there's loud music playing. Whenever they're about to see it, something happens that just manages to block the action from their view. As old as this cliche is, it's put to spectacular use here; these two huge men just beat the stuffing out of each other to the tune of La Donna È Mobile. The entire sequence is just fantastically shot and goes on for a surprising amount of time; so many superhero fights these days only last a short while, due to the expensive special effects required to bring the action from the page to the screen. In this situation, the only special effects needed involve two big guys, some stunt weapons, and a few breakable walls. Really, all of the action in the film is pretty top-knotch, but the fight with The Russian is easily the highlight. It's one in a long list of "cool Punisher moments" this film has to offer.
As a "film" film, The Punisher is not a great movie. With the exception of Thomas Jane (who, again, gives a spectacular performance), the entire cast is pretty lackluster, the story is basically a bunch of action scenes strung together by an inane master plan, and overall it's just a pretty silly picture. That said, as a fun action flick, The Punisher is a fantastic good time. There weren't many moments during its runtime that I wasn't genuinely enjoying myself and, while it's not a perfect adaptation of the comics, Thomas Jane is the perfect Frank Castle. If you're a fan of The Punisher or cheesy action heroes in general, I highly recommend it. It's the best Punisher film we've got until the inevitable MCU Netflix series, but then even if that turns out to be amazing, it probably won't star Thomas Jane.
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